NFL LOW DOWN WEEK 20

The proceeding Low Down is brought to you by M.A.D.R.. That's MOTHER'S AGAINST DICK RIDING. It's not to late stop dick riding even if you have been doing it all your life. I know a lot of you want to know what dick riding is. I will break it down as easy as I can for all of you that have been effected by lead paint or have crack heads for parents. Remember when Michael Jordan played for the Bulls and you cheered his ass on because it was the popular thing to do. That's dick riding motherfucker, because you don't cheer the Bulls now because they are sorry as shit. Dick riders are like bandwagon jumpers except they don't realize it. In Baltimore alone I know about 60 well known Dick Riders and some of them I call friend. Get out before it's too late and one more thing after last nights ass whipping courtesy of the Lakers .Curtis stop that dick riding of Queen James.

• By now you all know I hate Omar Epps and the Steelers and for good reason. I'm a Cowboys fan first and for most and I can not have the Steelers winning a 6TH Superbowl before my Boys. Not on my watch. The only pleasure I got out of Sunday's game was that smiling ass Bitch Heinz Ward wasn't running around antagonizing motherfuckers with his antics.
• Now here are my views on yesterday's game. It is amazing how Ravens fans view Sunday's game a lot different with Harbaugh as a coach than they would have if Billick was there. Raven's fans are tipping their hats to the Steelers and saying how proud they were of their team even though they loss. They are not blaming Flacco either. They are just saying that the better team won. That's bullshit.
• If Billick was head coach and Bowler was the QB all hell would have broke loose. Billick's genius title would have been questioned and everyone would have blamed Kyle Bowler for the loss including his teammates.When Flaco threw the pass that Polamalu ran back, the Ravens gave up. No one wanted to tackle him and the game was still in doubt. If Polamalu is tackled two things could have happened. The Ravens could have forced a punt or forced the Steelers to kick a field goal. Either scenario and the Ravens would have still had a chance to win. The score was 16-14 at that point. A field goal by the Steelers would have made it 19-14. A Ravens touchdown wins the game. I'm not bashing anyone , but you know that shit is true. Polamalu on his gimpy leg should have been tackled, but the offense gave up after the pick. "What you talking about Willis McGahee and Derrick Mason played their asses off. All you Raven fans that talked bad about Willis became his biggest supporters after he got fucked up. When you thought he couldn't contribute anymore you wanted to get rid of him. After that long run in Dallas and his success since you all started dick riding Willis. I don't like McGahee never had never will, but at least I never questioned his heart or ability to still play the game. I respect Mason, because he played four straight games with a separated shoulder and never complained. He is a throwback to when guys didn't do their talking off field they let their play on the field do it for him. T-Sizzle you are all man. Playing with one arm you were the best defender on the field. If you stay with the Ravens their is your future leader on D. The Raven's offense couldn't get anything going and I put this on Cameron. You know you have a rookie playing in the biggest game of his career. Even though Flaco won't admit it you know he was as nervous as you are when you take an aids test. Your positive you know what the results will be ,but your still scared none the less. I think the Ravens should have ran more and played a battle of field position with the Steelers. Don't change who you are now. PLAY YOUR GAME! You know who the Ravens missed the most. Chris Mcallister! You never replaced him and trust me you wouldn't catch Chris out there slipping and sliding and doing the electric slide like the rest of those buffoons out there in the secondary. The Ravens had their chances and blew it. It is ok to be mad at Flaco, or your receivers, or Cameron, or Harbaugh for that matter. You know you would have done the same to Billick.
• Hey Benedict Reid you got what you deserve. Philly fans who are you blaming now. Bet not be Donovan. He wasn't the one getting stepped on by Fitzgerald. Ever heard of making someone else beat you. I heard all of this talk about the Eagles being this years version of the Giants. Actually the Cardinals are this years version of the Giants and the Giants are this years version of the Cowboys. How so do you say?
• Unlike the Giants of last year the Eagles went into the playoffs on a roll. After crushing my Boys their confidence went through the roof. The Giants loss to the Pats last year and they backed into the playoffs. No one expected the Giants to beat the Cowboys let alone win the Superbowl. The Eagles were favorites in all of their playoff games and were seen as a legitimate threat to win it all.
• The Cardinals like the Giants ended the season with question marks hanging over their heads. They didn't play their best ball until the playoffs started. No one expected them to beat the Panthers and look at them now. They are in the playoffs.
• Eagles fans enjoy the off season and dream about what could have been bitches! Sorry Fiq , but you know I hate yall motherfuckers!
• Word out of Dallas is Jerry Jones wants Ray Lewis. Memo to Ravens fans. Who doesn't want Ray Lewis. Ray Lewis is like that fine ass girl you knew in high school who had a steady boyfriend. You always knew she was fine, but you never had the chance to tell her. Now years later you are both older, but she is still fine, so what do you do? You tell her how you always felt about her and how much you want her now. You hope that is enough to finally make her yours. Ravens fans that's the scenario and the other teams out there are salivating about having a player the caliber of Ray Lewis on their team. Sources tell me the Cowboys are willing to give Ray 25 million dollars in guaranteed money.That's a lot for any player, but hey it's not my money. Part of me wants Ray to be a Cowboy and another part of me wants him to retire a Raven. Either way I'm happy. As much as I dislike Jerry getting involved in everything, I know his heart is in the right place.
• Steelers or Cardinals. I will give my pick next week.
• The hit that McGahee received was the most vicious hit I have ever heard in my life and I wasn't even in Pittsburgh. The doctors said he was neurologically cleared to leave the hospital. I'm not Doogie Howser or anything but what the fuck does that mean? Is that code for, because his neck is still attached to his head he is OK to leave. What kind of clinic did they send McGahee too, because I know damn well they normally keep you there and run tests.? I guess that's what happens when a Raven gets treated for an injury in Pittsburgh. That's a rivalry for your ass!
• The more you tell the Cardinals they don't belong the more they keep proving everyone wrong. Do you think Kurt Warner belongs in the Hall of Fame. I do and if he wins it will be a no brainier.
• Not to long ago my family members Nick, Big Bub, and myself engaged in an argument over who was the best back of all time. I said BO JACKSON,ERIC DICKERSON,AND EMMITT SMITH. They all had the audacity to say Barry (I HAVE NEVER DONE SHIT WHEN IT COUNTED SANDERS) was better than Emmitt. I will argue my points about this in another Low Down, but who do you think is the best RB,QB,WR, and DEFENSIVE PLAYERS YOU HAVE EVER SEEN? Come up with your own top 5 and I will write about it next week.
• The Jets have hired Rex Ryan as their new head coach and I say what took so long. Ravens fans you have nothing to worry about, because defensive coordinators come and go, but as long as Ray is there you will always have a top 5 Defense.
• While out in L.A. covering the Lakers and the Cavs I ran into Charles Barkley and after talking about the days we spent making it drizzle in Alabama we got into a discussion about who is better Mike or Kobe. You know I had to ask, so I asked Chuck was the Head that good that it made you track the bitch down when you spotted her. He said it was the best he had ever received and he wanted some more. I said but Chuck you are married. He said that getting your dick sucked is not cheating, because the girl can't get pregnant and I said TNT pays you how much to say stupid shit like that. He told me that getting your balls licked is very therapeutic and it allows you to release your stress. I said yeah and bust a nut too huh. He said that the guys that wrote the bible were racist and must have had little dicks, because it's nothing like some good old head to finish off the night. I said Charles are you listening to yourself and he said it was his constitutional right to bear arms and lay pipe nightly as long as the girl is over 18. We never finished our conversation, but Chuck is a character. He invited me to go gambling and hit the strip joints with him, Pacman, and Plaxico since they are not doing anything anytime soon.
• BUFFOON OF THE WEEK: Jerry Jones
• I now officially put this man in the BUFFOON HALL OF FAME. He has his own wing. News out of Dallas is that the Cowboys charter plane often left late for games while waiting for players to show up. This is bullshit. Jimmy Johnson once left Michael Irvin's ass at home and told him to fly commercial if he wanted to play. Players are fined $100 for being late to practice. Sources say the Boys were unhappy with Romo's practice habits. This is our fucking leader. No one questions Brady or Manning's practice habits. Even Iverson said practice were talking about practice not the game practice, questions Romo dedication. He said he would never fly to the Cobo one week before the playoffs and not expect criticism. We are two weeks before the Super Bowl and the Boys make the headlines for all the wrong reasons. There is know leadership or direction on this team. No wonder you want Sugar Ray on your team. This team is a joke only no one is laughing.

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