What The Fuck!!!!

• I feel the need to way in on this shit, because everyone else has and I want to shed some light on this subject. Eldrick Tont Woods only people like me who run in his inner circle know him by this name was groomed to be the best golfer the game has ever seen by his father Earl Woods. Unfortunately no amount of grooming or teaching or preaching can save u from the dangers of that sweet nectar known as PUSSY. This is not an indictment of Eldrick or Earl, but a revelation to the fact that no matter how much money,power or fame you have it can not protect you from the evils of PUSSY.
• I can tell you where it all went wrong for Eldrick. The day motherfuckers started referring to you as Tiger and proclaiming you Black Jesus in the golf community. When people start referring to you as Magic instead of Earvin, or The Juice instead of Orenthal your life has changed forever and you start to believe your invincleble. According to modern history Earvin didn't fuck mad bitches and contract HIV. Magic did. According to modern history Orenthal James didn't commit double murder. OJ The Juice Man did.
• Charles Barkley actually said it best in a Nike commercial when he said that he is not a role model and that just because he can dunk a basketball doesn't mean he should be responsible for raising your kids. Eldrick fucked up by trying to live up to a standard that is almost impossible to do. When Corporate America comes calling you have to be careful when you pick up that phone and say hello. Once you are given keys to that special room you can't fuck up or there will be consequences and repercussions. When you are an African American there are special rules that you have to follow to get into this room and maintain membership.
• You can't have corn rolls and wear your pants sagging off your ass.
• You have to be head and shoulders above the rest of your peers.
• You have to be well spoken and not seen as a threat to end up on America's Most Wanted.
• And the most important thing. We don't mind you getting married, but you better be real careful of your actions after that. Now I know you are saying to yourself that doesn't sound that bad, but you didn't read the fine print. The fine print says if you marry a blond haired blued eyed pure sweet nectar christian white woman, you better not bring any physical or mental harm to her in any way. If you marry a black woman and you get caught out there, we can do damage control to try and maintain your image.
• I know you are saying to yourself Romeo that is not true. Before Eldrick there was a man named Michael Jeffrey Jordan and he cheated on his wife on numerous occasions and was allowed to keep his endorsements. In fact he got divorced and there was not one interview of any of his mistresses or TMZ following him around town. There were no poor Juanita Jordan interviews on ESPN or any she should take the kids, leave his ass and take his money remarks from any columnists I know. Yet because Tiger didn't read the fine print, the overwhelming support for the pure christian white woman is causing him to hide out and give up playing golf temporarily. Think about this. Kobe was on trial for rape and he would go to court testify and then hop his ass on a jet fly to LA and drop 40 on somebody just because he could. Tiger has not been accused of a crime. Matter of fact he got his ass whipped and he is scared to show his face in public. You do the math. Tiger pure christian white woman. Jordan black woman. Kobe mixed woman. Shaq has done the unforgivable and slept with a fellow player's fiance and his wife has filed for divorce. This motherfucker slept with a bitch named Superhead and he continues to do commercials. Where is the public outcry or support for his wife at?Oh his wife is black. Get the picture yet.
• Tiger you also fucked up when you told corporate America that you were not black, because you painted yourself into a corner where it gets pretty lonely at the top. As long as you were a saint and winning tournaments you were cool, but when you fucked up you became a Nigger again. Eldrick you are one grimy motherfucker. You were fucking IHOP waitresses, Quickie Foodmart attendants, Chick Fila drive thru girls,and Hotel bathroom attendants. Thats some JR Rider type shit. You are a fucking Billionaire. Have you ever watched the Wire. They invented something called pre paid phones that you can dispose of and constantly get ones. Eldrick because you believed in your Tiger persona so much you were dumb enough to leave your name on a voice message that was delivered to one of your hoes. No nigger that I know is that motherfucking stupid. Maybe you aren't really black, because street smarts and swagger aren't your strong points. Next time you decide to go creeping send out your boys first to do the scoping and then sit back in your SECLUDED HIDE OUT and wait for the street meat to come take care of you. Afterwards dismiss their asses and move on.Don't let them stay the night with you and offer them breakfast and a ride home. Tell them to get the fuck out and move on. No Bitch I know is going to share that story with Tmz, Jet or any other publication for that matter. Now that's what Niggers do. You don't show a bitch where you live and exchange numbers with them dumb ass. You look real naive right now.
• Finally I hear that Charles Barkley is trying to call you and give you advice. This coming from a man that got arrested for drunk driving after he spotted an old hoe that he said gave him the best head of his life now he wants to offer advice to you. That's like Obama getting political advice from Marion Barry or Sheila Dixon. Apologize to your wife, your family and her family although I think it is too late. Second tell America to mind it's motherfucking business and get back to kicking ass on the golf course.
• Remember before there was Tiger there was Eldrick and you are not responsible for living up to a standard that is not achievable just because you can hit a golf ball. When you come to this revelation your father Earl will be just as proud as when you won the Masters.
• I'M OUT LIKE LIKE THAT LOOK ON DWADE'S FACE AFTER KOBE JAYED HIS ASS UP!!!!!!
  

NFL LOW DOWN WEEK 12

I'm going to start this week off with a letter I received from Jason Whitlock of the NFL Truth's on Foxsports.

Dear Romeo, I love reading the Low Down column every week. Your take on the world of sports is breath taking and provocative. Missed your column last week, but I know you were out providing for your family, making that loot and giving your woman that good loving that only you can deliver. Over the years I have heard you use the term dick riding and I'm quite familiar with it. I love to take things from your column and use them in mine and get props for them. It makes me look good and I have garnered a lot of street cred using your topics. If reading your column and using some of your material is considered dick riding then YIIPPIE YAH YAY AND GIDDIE UP MUTHERFUCKER !!! I'M ON THIS RIDE FOR THE LONG HAUL.

• UPON FURTHER REVIEW:


• Upon further review I apologize to Chris Johnson for next recognizing your talent, but right now you are the best back in football and you are proving it weekend and week out. You are averaging 6.4 yds a carry. That is some TECMO BOWL SHIT you are doing to mutherfuckers in the NFL. You are the MVP of the league not named Brees, Manning or Farve.


• Upon further review Drew Brees plays like the Steve Nash of the NFL. He is an excellent leader and the sky is the limit for him and his team until they play BIG D GODDAMMIT.


• Upon further review The Giants, Eagles, Steelers, Ravens, and Falcons aren't elite teams, but they are good teams that are capable of making noise in the playoffs.


• Upon further review the demise of the Chargers was greatly exaggerated. One team that does not want to see them is the Colts.


• Upon further review Ray Rice is a bad boy. If he doesn't turn that pass against Steelers into a big gain, The Ravens could have possibly loss that game.


• Upon further review T.O. still has something left. If he would have kept his fucking mouth shut he could still be doing his thing in Dallas. He would certainly be an upgrade over that halter top wearing buffoon ass mutherfucker Roy Williams. Take a look at that tight ass short jersey that he wears with the back cut out. Bitch ass trick. Sorry about that , but I can't stand mutherfuckers who look like Tarzan , but play like Jane. Just like Sheila Dixon his ass is stealing money too.


• Upon further review the Deadskins still suck and Jim Zorn is still a buffoon. Love that organization. Why don't you sign Mom's Mabely to play tackle next year. She can't be any worse than the production you have gotten from Haynesworth this year.


• THINGS THAT I LEARNED IN WEEK 12:


• I learned that if Larry Johnson can gain 100 yds running behind the Bengals line then the Offensive line coach should be in line for a hefty raise.


• I learned that Dennis Dixon looks like modern day Randall Cunningham. He looks throws and runs like Randall. With the proper coaching and playing time hopefully he will have a career similar to Randall.


• I learned that since SPYGATE came out the Pats haven't won shit.


• I learned that the Colts don't have an identity yet. They just win games, never panic and always play with a sense of urgency.


• I learned that their are no ugly girls named Heather and no attractive ones named Gertrude.


• I learned that Ray Rice is the the true MVP of the Ravens not Flacco.


• I learned that no matter how well Matt Leinart plays Vince Young will always upstage him. Leinart had perhaps his best day as a pro throwing for 21 of 21 for 220 yds.His rival from the 2006 national championship game threw for 387 yds and 1TD including the game winner. Young converted three 4th downs and took his team down field on a 18 play 99yd drive that was Elway like to win the game.


• I learned that sometimes an Owner can actually make a good football decision. That finger gesturing buffoon Bud Adams told Fisher to play Young and 5 wins later Fisher looks like a genius.


• UNNECESSARY ROUGHNESS:


• Can someone please tell me how Ralph Friedgen is allowed to keep his job after going 2-10, but yet all Byron Scott has done is win and he has been fired twice. Byron was fired after taking the Nets to 2 final appearances and winning coach of the year honors. Correct me if I'm wrong but don't you normally fire a coach when his team actually sucks. Byron Scott makes the playoffs every year and now he is at home playing the role of Mr. Mom and car pooling with women named Esther and Agnice. No Md. team has ever loss 10 games and for Friedgen to still have a job disturbs me. What kind of standards do we have at Md. I thought going 6-5 and playing in THE TOYS R US BOWL was bad enough but 2 and fucking 10. I can tolerate losses if they are to teams like FSU, THE U, or FLORIDA, but I can't tolerate losses to National Powers like Frostburgh St., SWISS MISS UNIVERSITY,RAY CHARLES SCHOOL FOR THE BLIND, DUNCAN HINES UNIVERSITY OR THE WALBROOK JUNCTION ACADEMY FOR MISFITS AND MALCONTENTS.I can't tolerate this shit anymore. Mediocrity has become the rallying cry at MD. and I want no parts of this. I have given up hope of seeing Md. return to its winning ways.


• HIGH FIVE


• 1) COLTS 11-0 There is no such thing as a safe lead when you play the Colts.


• 2) SAINTS 11-0 A walking living breathing video game.


• 3) VIKINGS 10-1 Farve plus health equals Super bowl?


• 4)COWBOYS 8-3 What does December hold for Romo and the Boys.


• 5) CHARGERS 8-3 Much like Dallas can San Diego win when it counts.


• STOCK UP STOCK DOWN:


• VINCE YOUNG QB TITANS:Who saw this coming? He has poise and looks confident.


• CHARLES WOODSON CB PACKERS:The best cover corner in the league right now.


• MILES AUSTIN WR COWBOYS: He will burn man coverage all day.


• T.O. WR BILLS: 14 Catches 297 yds and 2Tds. That's my wide out. That's my wide out


• MARK CLAYTON WR RAVENS: When he plays well the Ravens are hard to beat.


• STOCK DOWN:


• ELI MANNING QB GIANTS: Feeling the heat.


• JAKE DELHOMME QB PANTHERS: His career could possibly be over.


• MATT SCHAUB QB TEXANS: Plays like Peyton in the 1st half. Eli in the 2nd.
• HINES WARD WR STEELERS: Criticizing your starting QB is never good.
• BEAUTY OF THE WEEK:
• Alicia Keys is my beauty of the week. Can anyone tell me how Swiss Beatz pulled that, because I am at a loss of words.
• BUFFOON OF THE WEEK:
• Hines Ward how could you call out your QB and question his manhood on National TV. You questioned the severity of his concussion and you said that you often lied and played when you had a concussion. Now I know why you are always smiling, because you don't have it all upstairs.You don't even have common sense enough to know when you have been fucked up, so everything is funny to you. I guess you enjoy riding buses and wearing your helmet on and off the field. What good is having all that money if you can't even count it? When someone hits you so hard that your brain moves and you don't know what day of the week it is. It is time to move on to something safer like being a shark dentist or a crossing guard in Iraq. It is not tuff or a badge of honor to play with a concussion , it's stupid. I would love to see you in twenty years when you look like Leon Spinks and talk like Larry Holmes. Then we will see who is smiling.
• Now on to the real BUFFOON OF THE WEEK. I choose myself. That's right mutherfuckers I choose myself. I have to apologize to Bobby Bowden, but not for the reasons that you think. I still believe it is time for him to go and I think the game has passed him by., but he deserves to go out on his terms. Florida St. was nothing before he got there and at their current pace they will be nothing after he leaves. From 1987 to 2000 he coached Florida St. to top 5 finishes. He also coached FSU to 2 national titles including going wire to wire. That shit is unprecedented in College Football. That record will never be broken. There are certain coaches like Bowden and Joe Pa who are bigger than the University they coach at and they deserve the benefit of the doubt. Florida St. dropped the ball by going public and embarrassing him without reaching an agreement with him first behind closed doors. They should have never reached an agreement with that buffoon Jimbuffon Fisher to take over in 2011, because Bowden never announced his decision to step down. With all of his contributions to the University he should be allowed to call his own shots not be penciled in as a figure head. Yes his won loss record warrants making a change, but his honor and legacy mean more. I am embarrassed by my actions and Florida St officials should feel the same. God Bless you Bobby Bowden. Thanks for the Memories and I will never forget you. Love you man.
• I'M OUT LIKE ALLEN IVERSON.

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