Tuesday, May 31, 2011

THE NBA AND THE WWE ARE ONE AND THE SAME

Is it just me or does today's NBA look more like a wrestling show than a sporting event? The off the court drama is more compelling than the game itself. A PIMP NAMED STERN would have it no other way as he digs into the WWE playbook to run his product. Today's NBA is filled with betrayal, lust, blindsiding, secret meetings, surprise trades,heel and face turns and a whole lot more drama than even OPRAH could conjure up.. Ratings are up, money is being made and Stern is pulling the strings like the master puppeteer that he is.
  • LeBron James the humble superstar from Akron used to be a fan favorite. He was beloved by millions and seen as the future face of the NBA. From his throne in Cleveland he had his fans wearing Nike, eating McDonald's, drinking Sprite, buying State Farm insurance and saying their prayers and eating their vitamins, but something unexpected happened along the way. He couldn't manage to win the big win one no matter how hard he tried. The last straw was when THE BIG SHOW Shaq came in to watch his back and he still couldn't beat the HBK THE SHOWSTOPPER Kobe Bryant. Enough of this shit. Fuck the fans, my sorry ass crew and my manager. I need some real help if I am going to defeat HBK Kobe Bryant.
  • This is where A PIMP NAMED STERN, SCOTT HALL AKA DWADE AND BIG SEXY CHRIS BOSH CAME INTO PLAY. Stern told LeBron I love you and I always wanted you to be the man, but we have to find a way to take down HBK Kobe Bryant. I got it you will hold a press conference at the Boys and Girls club to announce you are going to South Beach, but for this to work you have to visit other teams and give the impression that you are undecided. If you play the media the way I tell you Hollywood James you will be the man in know time and no one will see it coming. Funny thing happened though. The fans and the media turned on him. With this plan in place the NWO WOLFPAC was born in South beach. Hollywood James, The Lone Wolf Dwade and Big Sexy Chris Bosh would soon unleash their terror on all of the NBA for having the audacity to dare boo their greatness. Stern knew this would happen and ratings would go through the roof. His #1 babyface turning heel was a stroke of genius and something the NBA needed to make the product more interesting.
  • For this to work though others had to play along. In return for winning a ring 3 years ago the Celtics had to shock the world and trade Kendrick Perkins for no reason at all. HBK Kobe Bryant was attacked in Japan by unknown thugs, underwent surgery and much like HBK played in pain all year without giving up. Gasol played the role of Starscream and turned on Phil and the Lakers by sabotaging them from the inside. Stern paid Gasol off and he played his role well. He used the sweet nectar of his girlfriend to make the other Laker players soft. Straight out of the Shane Douglas playbook of ass offering.
  • While all of this was going on Carmello was playing the role of Jeff Hardy fighting for his team, but really wanting to jump shit. A PIMP NAMED STERN needing a face in TNA AKA New York and told the Charismatic Enigma Carmello to hold on and he would get him to New York faster than he got Hollywood James out of Cleveland. There was one catch though. With the NWO in Miami playing the heel role Mello would have to play the role of face. Accept you beatdown and smile about it bitch if you want to be in NY or keep your monkeyass in Denver was Stern's message to Mello. Nothing was going to keep him from keeping his promise to Hollywood James. Seeing a big payday ahead and tv time with the NWO Mello saw it as a no brainer. I will for Hollywood anytime. Hell I laid for HBK Kobe Bryant for years.
  • How did Kobe become HBK? Stern struck a deal with his ass after Colorado and told him after years of being the top heel he wanted him to embrace his fans and teammates and become a face. In doing so he had to play on the Olympic team and play big brother to those fools he hated. He had to embrace James, Mello and Wade and instead of offense he had to lead by playing defense. Masterful!!!!!! Kobe became a fan favorite over night and he was seen as a leader and unselfish by all of the world while leading team USA to the gold. He replaced LeBron as the top fan favorite and HBK Kobe Bryant was born. His endorsements went through the roof and the media and the fans were loving him. THEY CHANTED MVP FOR HIM IN PHILLY AND BOSTON. That's a transformation for your ass.
  • Now Kobe is in hiding talking to Stern about his next move. I think he will come out like Randy Orton a rule breaker that is loved by all next year, but never hesitates to start shit.
  • Stay tuned the best is yet to come.

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